Talking to Liberals About Revolution

During any age of unrest, left-liberals and right-conservatives (and even some classical liberals) will reveal the worst side of their respective political positions. In short, the visceral kicks in and the brain flatlines. While I could write about the conservative response to Middle Eastern unrest, they seem quite divided. Not so the left-liberals who are in full “brain-dead” mode (to grab playwright David Mamet’s quote about “brain-dead liberalism”).

In the past month, I have listened to the Left’s rhetorical giddiness about “Revolution!” As the father of teen and pre-teen daughters, I can assure you that this brain-dead response is reminiscent of young girls dreaming about Justin Bieber.

Here are the questions I ask of any revolution in the Middle East, along with the usual mindless liberal answers:

1. Will there be more or less religious freedom?

Liberal #1: “I don’t really care about religion.”

Liberal #2: “What are Jews and Christians doing over there?”

Liberal #3: “It’s all our fault anyway” or “some people have different values” (that is a catch-all brain dead response to ANY question).

2. Will there be more economic freedom?

Liberal #1: “Economic freedom is code for neoliberal exploitation of those lands”

Liberal #2: “They will seek a Middle Way between capitalism and socialism”

Liberal #3: “Who cares about the economy? Let those people be free!!!!” (The incapacity to care about economics underlies much of the stupidity that passes for analysis in daily punditry).

3. Will democracy last or will something disagreeable replace it?

Liberal #1: “It can’t get any worse”

Liberal #2: “What is the meaning of ‘disagreeable'”?

Liberal #3: “Democracy is a basic universal right. Ask the U.N.”

4. Will women be freer?

Liberal #1: “Many women are in the streets so the answer must be ‘yes.'”

Liberal #2: “We must respect other cultures” (ignores the question)

Funny Liberal #3: “What’s wrong with having four women as servant-slaves?”

5. Will the revolution be in the best interests of America?

Liberal #1, 2, 3: Who cares?

Jonathan Bean is a Research Fellow at the Independent Institute, Professor of History at Southern Illinois University, and editor of the Independent book, Race & Liberty in America: The Essential Reader.
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