Mainstream Economists Will Have a Blast at This Year’s Halloween Parties

The latest dance craze in mainstream economics is a reworking of a Halloween classic, updated to suit the ghosts and goblins haunting the profession today. (Chorus lines appear in bold font.)

The Econ Smash

I was working in the lab late one night
When my eyes beheld an eerie sight
A Keynesian from his slab began to rise
And suddenly to my surprise

He did the smash
He did the econ smash
The econ smash
It was a graveyard splash
He did the smash
It caught on in a flash
He did the smash
He did the econ smash

From my laboratory in academe east
To committee rooms where politicians feast
The ghouls all came from New Classical abodes
To get a jolt from outmoded electrodes

They did the smash
They did the econ smash
The econ smash
In the midst of the crash
They did the smash
It caught on in a flash
They did the smash
They did the econ smash

Zombie banks were having fun
The party had just begun
The guests included Greenspan
Geithner and Paulson

The scene was rockin’, all were digging the noise
Bernanke broke his chains and freed the printing-press boys
The coffin-bangers were about to arrive
With their vocal group, “The Inflation Five”

They did the smash
They did the econ smash
The econ smash
In the midst of the crash
They did the smash
It caught on in a flash
They did the smash
They did the econ smash

Out from his coffin, Keynes’s voice did ring
Seems he was troubled by just one thing
He opened the lid and started to yap
And said, “What has become of my Liquidity Trap?”

It’s now the smash
It’s now the econ smash
The econ smash
In the midst of the crash
They did the smash
It caught on in a flash
They did the smash
They did the econ smash

Now everything’s cool, Keynes is leading the band
And the econ smash is the hit of the land
For you, the job seekers, this smash is meant too
To land a new job, tell them Krugman sent you

Then you can smash
Then you can econ smash
The econ smash
And do this graveyard splash
Then you can smash
You’ll catch on in a flash
Then you can smash
Then you can econ smash 

(With apologies to Bobby “Boris” Pickett)

Robert Higgs is Senior Fellow in Political Economy at the Independent Institute, author or editor of over fourteen Independent books, and Editor at Large of Independent’s quarterly journal The Independent Review.
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